Body Fluids - Whatever

By Troy Foster

This week, I saw a guy (30-year old or so) freak out because some kid sneezed and snot flew out of his nose.  Now, the guy - obviously not a father - was far away and just reacting in disgust to the fluids flowing from this kid's nose.

I used to be like that.  Grossed out by random body fluids.  Even the term is disgusting.  Now, we have four kids.  And I stay at home with them part-time.  Perspectives change.  I probably have a combination of snot, poop, pee, blood, vomit, bile, and saliva on this “clean” shirt that I just put on this morning. The beauty, however, is that if I spill anything on it – ever – (and I do mean anything) - I have four excuses.  CSI would have a field day with my clothes.

Before we had kids, I gave mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to an old dude that had a heart attack.  And, he threw up in my mouth.  (I cursed myself for taking that class for years.)  Of course, I did the right thing.  Spit out the throw up and kept going.  He died.  So, it was sad.  But, I was also disgusted that a stranger threw up in my mouth for nothing.

Now, that wouldn’t even phase me.  If anyone is going to have a heart attack, having it around me is the best bet, as I’ll have no hesitation about the mouth-to-mouth.  Can’t guarantee results though!


Next time, I plan to talk about the best way to get your kids thru a transcontinental flight without a peep.